I haven’t been a child for a very long time, but I occasionally can still hear my Mom’s voice in my head. It’s like an internal alarm system notifying me that I need to course-correct. Most times, it’s something of small consequence such as, “We can’t afford to air condition the entire neighborhood!” (close the door). But lately, I've been hearing, “There are other people in this world besides you!”
Mom reserved this for times when I was being a selfish brat – for example when I would whine about wanting pizza for dinner instead of the restaurant my family had chosen. Or when I didn’t want to go to one of my brother’s tennis tournaments. It seems like a toss-away statement, but the more I think about it the more I realize it was actually seismic.
THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD BESIDES YOU. This one little phrase eventually shaped my view of the world. It took me outside my head and forced me to develop empathy. I began to notice that there were external points of view that I needed (at the very least) to consider and (ideally) perhaps from which I could learn something.
Looking around these days, I have noticed that there are a lot of people out there whose mothers clearly never said this to them. There are the small incidents – people not using turn signals while they drive, people who do not wipe down the gym equipment after they use it. These are just a part of life’s daily annoyances. But other incidents are happening on a larger scale with greater consequence.
I see a lot of people who compare the recent overturning of Roe v Wade with 2020’s mask mandates and vaccine requirements. If you’re not aware that there are other people in this world besides you – it probably seems like a sound argument. You can’t choose to end your pregnancy. I couldn’t choose to go without a mask. It’s the same thing in their heads. But the difference is that one of these actions affects OTHER PEOPLE. If you choose to go without a mask (or vaccine), you are increasing the odds that you will catch a disease, which YOU CAN THEN PASS ALONG to OTHER PEOPLE. If someone opts not to carry a baby to term, they don’t increase the risk for others to miscarry or end their own pregnancy against their will. One of these decisions affects the collective.
On an even grander scale, you have decision makers in power, like Clarence Thomas. After the Roe v Wade precedent was overturned, Thomas wrote that the Supreme Court “should reconsider all of this court’s substantive due process precedents, including Griswold, Lawrence, and Obergefell”. These decisions were also based on privacy rulings and regarded issues like contraception and same-sex marriage. It’s quite telling that he omitted Loving v Virginia. This was the Supreme Court decision that made interracial marriage legal in our country. Thomas is 74 years old, straight, and in an interracial marriage. I would imagine issues of gay marriage and contraception are not part of his realm. But interracial marriage is, therefore he left it off the table. I’m guessing Clarence Thomas’s mother never bothered to tell him that “there are other people in this world besides you.” And because he is in a position to actually affect change, his lack of empathy has staggering consequences for the entire nation.
I don’t know what the solution is for the adults who are already out there. It seems like if you didn’t learn this lesson early in life, you never will. But for the parents out there raising kids – PLEASE share with them this vital nugget of wisdom. THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD BESIDES YOU. If you don’t, we all will continue to suffer the consequences. And it sucks living in a world with dirty gym equipment, tone-deaf social media posts, and legislators who pass and enforce laws that only benefit themselves. Avoiding that in adulthood is definitely worth occasionally not getting pizza for dinner as a child.
Mom reserved this for times when I was being a selfish brat – for example when I would whine about wanting pizza for dinner instead of the restaurant my family had chosen. Or when I didn’t want to go to one of my brother’s tennis tournaments. It seems like a toss-away statement, but the more I think about it the more I realize it was actually seismic.
THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD BESIDES YOU. This one little phrase eventually shaped my view of the world. It took me outside my head and forced me to develop empathy. I began to notice that there were external points of view that I needed (at the very least) to consider and (ideally) perhaps from which I could learn something.
Looking around these days, I have noticed that there are a lot of people out there whose mothers clearly never said this to them. There are the small incidents – people not using turn signals while they drive, people who do not wipe down the gym equipment after they use it. These are just a part of life’s daily annoyances. But other incidents are happening on a larger scale with greater consequence.
I see a lot of people who compare the recent overturning of Roe v Wade with 2020’s mask mandates and vaccine requirements. If you’re not aware that there are other people in this world besides you – it probably seems like a sound argument. You can’t choose to end your pregnancy. I couldn’t choose to go without a mask. It’s the same thing in their heads. But the difference is that one of these actions affects OTHER PEOPLE. If you choose to go without a mask (or vaccine), you are increasing the odds that you will catch a disease, which YOU CAN THEN PASS ALONG to OTHER PEOPLE. If someone opts not to carry a baby to term, they don’t increase the risk for others to miscarry or end their own pregnancy against their will. One of these decisions affects the collective.
On an even grander scale, you have decision makers in power, like Clarence Thomas. After the Roe v Wade precedent was overturned, Thomas wrote that the Supreme Court “should reconsider all of this court’s substantive due process precedents, including Griswold, Lawrence, and Obergefell”. These decisions were also based on privacy rulings and regarded issues like contraception and same-sex marriage. It’s quite telling that he omitted Loving v Virginia. This was the Supreme Court decision that made interracial marriage legal in our country. Thomas is 74 years old, straight, and in an interracial marriage. I would imagine issues of gay marriage and contraception are not part of his realm. But interracial marriage is, therefore he left it off the table. I’m guessing Clarence Thomas’s mother never bothered to tell him that “there are other people in this world besides you.” And because he is in a position to actually affect change, his lack of empathy has staggering consequences for the entire nation.
I don’t know what the solution is for the adults who are already out there. It seems like if you didn’t learn this lesson early in life, you never will. But for the parents out there raising kids – PLEASE share with them this vital nugget of wisdom. THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD BESIDES YOU. If you don’t, we all will continue to suffer the consequences. And it sucks living in a world with dirty gym equipment, tone-deaf social media posts, and legislators who pass and enforce laws that only benefit themselves. Avoiding that in adulthood is definitely worth occasionally not getting pizza for dinner as a child.
